Growth can hurt, it should hurt. Growth by its nature, hurts. It indicates a movement forward and upward. It is a goodbye to what once served us so well. You are not alone in this. It is actually healthy to feel this growth and the pain around it.
We’ve each done this type of transitioning growth throughout our lives. We’ve given up the magic that was once childhood. Not that this is bad: it just no longer works for the way we must now think. We survived the teens and hopefully come out with some new ideas, values, and focus. We’ve crossed over into thinking in new ways, finding our own adult values and creating lives for ourselves that reflect who we transitioned into. We find ourselves on a new path that we may, or may not, have expected.
Sometimes, as adults, we run into a wall of recognition that shows us where we are currently is no longer effective. The life path we were on has radically changed and the bumps, rocks and cliffs are now unfamiliar and daunting. Maybe it was a single event that took us to this new place or maybe it was more gradual. In the search for answers we analyse where we are and determine where we would like to be.
There are many ways of looking at this situation. From a life perspective you might call it existential crisis. From a religious perspective, it might be viewed as a crisis of faith. Or you might simply call it “growing up”. No matter what you call it, it will still hurt.
Having an objective person to walk with you on this path can be helpful. Our goal in doing this work is to help us cross into a new life space, to mourn the old issue.